it's not the first time i've been wrong about someone, and it won't be the last...
2006-10-24 | 11:18 p.m.

So, I've changed my mind.

That friend of mine, the one I liked so much and was so inclined to give the benefit of the doubt for everything?

Fuck it. Fuck him.

Ooh, that's harsh. Where does that come from?

Glad you asked.

A few weeks ago, I sent him an email, pointing out that we hadn't even talked in six weeks, and did he want to get together sometime that week? He emailed me back, said yes.

Then vanished for two weeks.

I emailed him again... hellooooooo?

After a couple of days, he emailed me back, suggested the next day. I had plans, and told him so. How's next week, I asked.

For several days I didn't hear back from him. Then, today, I got an email suggesting ... today.

Maybe it's a total overreaction on my part to be as offended by that as I was. But seriously, three weeks ago, I had expected to see him. I'd planned for it. And then he flaked on me, without a word of explanation. He goes weeks and weeks without calling me or returning my emails, and now he suddenly expects me to be available on just a few hours' notice?

The sad thing is, last year, I would have been available. Available, and so desperate for friendship and human contact that I wouldn't have complained or even seen a problem.

I had friends like that once before, way back in grade eight - people I hung around with because I had no one else, people who took me for granted and left me out of damn near everything, and still I convinced myself that I really, really liked them.

Apparently, I didn't learn as much from that as I'd thought I did.

I don't know what I'm going to do about it. I should probably bitch him out, or else ditch him entirely. I take entirely too much crap from people. I need to work on my bitchiness some.

All I know is that I'm mad as hell. Probably madder than the present situation really merits, but given that I never let myself get genuinely mad at him before, that's maybe not so hard to explain.

Ugh.

So glad I have a life this year. Thank you child phonology lab. Thank you PGSS. Thank you Lavalife.

Fuck you, unreliable friend.

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